When I signed up to be a Daddy, I didn’t read the fine prints. I didn’t realize that I had to be a donkey on short notice. It’s too late now so here I am doing double duty as Daddy and Donkey, sometimes more Donkey than Daddy. I can’t bend to tie my laces without it being taken as an invitation to come aboard and come aboard they do. Without a saddle. They clamber aboard. From the stairs, the chair, the bed, whatever could be used as a stirrup to get on my back. Too many riders on a donkey? If that’s a law, it’s ignored with glee.
Then it’s time for the Donkey to sit down and take a rest. Rest? What’s that? Oh yeah, that’s when Daddy the Donkey magically turns into a bouncer. So using the arms of the couch as springboards, they leap on my chest, my stomach, my head, whatever body parts they land on as I lay there trying to recover from my last stint. (Thank goodness for rock hard abs!). Ever heard that saying, ‘It’s all fun and games until someone loses an eye?’ Well in my case it’s all fun and games until Daddy gets a knee or a foot in the groin.
After all this, I still got called annoying. No, not because I wasn’t a good and attentive donkey or a co-operative bouncer. I was bugging Mikhail about something that happened earlier in which I ended up being right and him wrong. I was enjoying the moment a bit too much and was repeatedly gloating my mimicking him. He finally said ‘Ok Daddy, stop! You are annoying!’. And stop I did. On a dime, because you know what? I suddenly realized that I was indeed annoying. I re-winded and listened to myself and I was, as he said, embarrassingly annoying. Nothing like a kid to point out your short comings.
And that is how Daddy The Annoying Donkey Bouncer came about.